Lovers Should Speak the Same Language


Lovers Should Speak the Same Language

Most often, relationships become shaky because of lack of communication between couples. One thing that binds couple who is in love is the language of love.

Let’s face it, there are many love issues that we often hear from both sides. They complain that they do not feel loved or appreciated. These are the common causes of conflicts in a relationship. Their minds are confused because they partner profess that they love them but they just don’t feel it. There are many reasons why they don’t feel loved. Their partners may be busy or distracted with some other things like their career.

Relationships normally experience problems because of lack of communication. To make any relationship work, you must be able to understand one another. You must find a way on how to effectively communicate with your partner. This is just a matter of connection.

Once you know how to deal with your partner through effective communication, conflicts and arguments would be lesser and if there is, you will find that both of you can resolve it easily.

The language of love

The language of love plays a vital role in making the relationship works. The secret is for both of you to know and share with each other the language of love.

Relationship gurus agree that this is the most effective tool on resolving conflicts between couples. It will also ignite the passion of two people in love, encourage more connection as well as keep the love.

There are various ways of showing your love to a person.  You may only use one of them and your partner will readily know that he is loved. Likewise, you can use more than one and for sure love is overflowing. However, if you have a certain language of love, don’t expect that your partner has the same of showing his love. Additionally, it can also change. You may change your way of showing your love over time and so does your partner. The important thing is you feel the love.

  1. Declaration of Love These are the words that you tell your partner. It is how you tell “I love you”, the way you praise your partner’s qualities and how you appreciate the presence of your lover.
  1. The Gifts When you receive a gift, it means that the person thinks of you. It could mean that the person appreciates and has affection towards you especially if the gift is given spontaneously without occasion.
  1. The Actions If you can’t say it through words, actions are the best alternative. You can show how much you love your partner by being selfless in your actions. Actions will convey that you appreciate and love the person.
  1. The Touch Touching doesn’t mean that it will lead to sex. A mere touch on your partner’s face, arms, legs or simply the physical touch of people who are in love means a lot.
  1. The Time Together Make the most of your time when you are together. Forget about the phones and other distractions. See to it that you will be able to build a strong bond during this time.

When our assumptions got it all wrong

I’ve attended so many relationship workshops and it only leads to one conclusion. We think and do too much without knowing that even simple things would make your partner feel loved.

We were formed into groups and were asked what kind of language of love we want to receive from our partners. The result was not what we expected and thought our partners would love to receive and do for them. We all assumed that what we are doing is enough to make them satisfied. We thought that they are happy with all the things we do for them.

I discovered that men do not need to buy expensive gifts just to make their partners happy. Telling them “I love you” or simply receiving a simple text that you care and love her will make them truly happy. The sweet words or simple cards will make any woman feel that she is truly loved.

Women on the other hand think that being physically intimate would make their men feel well loved. They thought that men would feel love when sex is good not knowing that a simple caring touches is enough for them to know that their partner loves them.

Let’s face it, there are many insignificant things that happen in our lives. The languages most of us speak, the things we do, how we express things and the things that we desire are often misinterpreted. Though small things, it gives new meaning perhaps bigger that what it should be.

The ways to having good communication between couples

  1. Choose your most preferred language of love

Decide on what kind of language of love you so much wanted wherein you will feel that you are well loved.

  1. Think of the language of love that you feel your partner wants to receive from you.

This time, you want to reciprocate his feelings. You need to know the language of love he prefers to receive from you.

  1. Steps 1 and 2 should be done by your partner.

When this is done, look at both your answers and you will be amazed with the response.

  1. Together with your partner, write down the language of language according to its significance.

Are you compatible with your choices? What is your most preferred language of love and what is the least significant?

  1. It is time to put them into action. Explore.

Give yourself five days to put these five languages of love into action. Start with the least significant and end up with the most significant. This will give positive result in your relationship. Talk about this with your partner. Ask your partner what he most preferred, enjoyed and gives him the feeling that he is well loved?

At the end of this experiment,  make a pact or an agreement with your partner that you put importance to the language of love  so that you will have a healthy, happy and fulfilled relationship.

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